Caring for Yourself After Divorce

by: Cheryl Donavan

Divorce can be very difficult. Often the parties involved have spent much of their time seeing to the needs of everyone else. But one of the single most important things divorcees can do is to concentrate on self care.

Taking care of you is about paying attention to the person you are on the inside as well as the outside. Balancing your life is essential to caring for you. Don't get caught up in the myths that say taking care of yourself is selfish and counter-productive. In fact the opposite is true. Taking care of you is the beginning of taking care of others. Creating a happy and healthy atmosphere after divorce can be accomplished. There are ways to be successful and to thrive.

So, how then can we go about taking care of ourselves?

  • First, prioritize your life. Is it really necessary for you to be involved in every activity? Look at weather or not your current activities and relationships add to your life. Get rid of those people, places, and things that don't. Choose no more than three fulfilling activities and be committed to them. Rediscover who you are.
  • Secondly, enjoy your freedom. Do the things you enjoy. Identify some of you favorite things and make a conscientious effort to do at least one of them on a regular basis and don't be afraid to try new things. You are now free to make your own decisions. Enjoy it!
  • Thirdly, learn from your mistakes. Don't be too hard on yourself. You're human and bound to make them. If you keep repeating the same mistakes over and over, be honest enough with yourself to identify that there is a problem. Work on solving the problem and then move on accepting who you are. Laugh at yourself and avoid repeating the same mistakes in the future.
  • Lastly, forgive yourself. Release the guilt and move forward in a positive way. Doing so will help you free yourself of both guilt and pain. Give it up and let it go. Your life will be happier when you do.

Self care is crucial to your well being as you forge a new life for yourself after divorce. It helps you to take care of others more effectively and brings about a sense of peace. Be true to yourself. Follow your dreams. Set goals and create a plan to help you accomplish them. If you begin to take a detour, be courageous enough to turn around and get back to your plan.

Being successful after divorce depends on you ability to care for yourself emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually. It can be a challenge but your success or failure ultimately depends on you.

Cheryl Lacey Donovan is an award winning best selling author, biblical life coach, mentor, and radio/television personality. She is the founder of Worth More than Rubies Ministries. She is co-author of the book Do You Still Do What Happens Happily Ever After with her husband Keith Donovan. To learn more about Cheryl visit

Cheryl writes for,, and book Cheryl for your next event email:cl3agency@gmail.comor call 203-565-6170.